A drunk was in front of a judge.

The judge said, "You've been brought here for drinking."

The drunk said, "Okay, let's get started!"

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A blonde's house was on fire. She called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please! My house is burning! Hurry!"

The operator said, "Okay, calm down and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"

The blonde answered, "Duh, in that big red truck!"

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A policeman pulls over a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow a breath into a breathalyzer.

"I can't do that, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm an asthmatic. I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube."

"Okay, we'll just get a urine sample down at the station."

"Can't do that either, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm a diabetic. I could get low blood sugar if I pee in a cup."

"Alright, we could get a blood sample."

"Can't do that either, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm a hemophiliac. If I give blood I could die."

"Fine then, just walk this white line."

"Can't do that either, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm drunk."

========================

Patient: "It must be tough spending all day with
your hands in someone's mouth.
"Dentist: "I just think of it as having my
hands in their wallet."

=======================

A man calls into the police station and says,


"My wife is missing."The officer asks,


"How long has she been gone?"


"A month."


"Why did you wait so long to report it?"


"Well, until yesterday I thought it was just a dream,


then I realized I didn't have any clean clothes to wear."


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i have no idea who sadarji is. lol thats all