update!! =D
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her. "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

"Damn!" says the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"

"Well now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? Did you steal it?"

"Oh, no", says the little old lady.

"You see, my back yard borders on the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds! So I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his pecker through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!"

"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "Good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well", says the little old lady, "not all of 'em pays up!"

"...."

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Learn Chinese in 5 minutes (You MUST read them aloud) English - Chinese

That's not right! - Sum Ting Wong

Are you harbouring a fugitive? - Hu Yu Ha i Ding

See me ASAP - Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man - Dum Fuk

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table! - Ai Bang Mai Fu Kin Ni

I think you need a face lift! - Chin Tu Fat

It's very dark in here! - Wai So Dim

I thought you were on a diet! - Wai Yu Mun Ching

This is a tow away zone! - No Pah King

Our meeting is scheduled for next week! - Wai Yu Kum Nao

Staying out of sight - Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

Your body odour is offensive - Yu Stin Ki Pu

Great - Fa Kin Su Pa

small update =))